When I finally, I reached HK Nishiki. It was beautiful. Seriously. It’s
actually bigger than I thought it’d be. Everyone keeps saying it’s tiny
but wtf, it’s not THAT tiny (or perhaps my imagination is just wild). I
bought choco for staff and wine for boss. He squealed. ♥ My god, it was too cute.He was like, please, have some food but while you’re here tonight, please, LEARN THE
MENU!
We ordered oyster mayo, tako cha, cheese immomochi (deep fried potato cakes + cheese omfg) and green tea pudding. MY GOD THE PUDDING. It was beautiful! Party in my mouth. It's one of those memories you have that you regret being an incompetent Asian for not TAKING A PICTURE OF THE FOOD. So from now, I will strive to be better and make sure I take pictures of awesome - pics or it didn't happen, right? Then I was horrified when the girl at the register told us the boss cleared the bill for me. HORRIFIED. Seriously, I didn't even find out how much it was. BUT NO, SERIOUSLY. Even he has to pay when he comes to eat at the restaurant in NZ. AND HE'S THE BOSS.
TUESDAY - DATE WITH IMMIGRATION
The main reason I stopped at HK was to get my HKPID and my Return Home Card sorted and get the HKD$6000. So on this day, I went to immigration. Sometimes when I walk through Auckland's CBD, I scrunch up my face because I feel like Auckland has become very polluted... then I walked from one MTR station to the next. Ugh. The pollution in HK is a totally different level altogether.
When I was in Hong Kong, I felt like an idiot. My Chinese really sucks but I look Chinese so when people look at me, they expect me to be able to understand. People have expectations and people in Hong Kong have really high expectations. They are also very judgemental. They speak really fast, they get really shitty with you when you aren't on the same level of "fastness" in "life". Every time I step outside, I see everyone rushing, WHAT IS THE RUSH? DUDE, PLEASE, CHILLAX. When I see businessmen rushing, yeah ok lah, I understand. But there are some people who seem like they've got time to spare, or at least seem to be idling but then once they start moving, it's like a sprinting contest. Y'all need to take a chill pill, step back and relax a bit, y'know? Or maybe it's just my NZ lifestyle. Whatever. So when I'm too tired or I just cannot be bothered, I pretend to be Japanese. I found that when people think I'm Japanese, they treat me a whole lot better. How did I achieve this? I changed my phone settings to Japanese and every time I needed to get out of a situation where a shop lady is hassling me, I whip it out and pretend to check conversion rates. I would purposely slow down at the unlock screen and they would see it is all in Japanese and they will back off right away. *shameless*
So at immigration, the officer hands me a piece of paper with Chinese words all over it and she says to me in Cantonese: "here, read this". I think it was an oath. You'd think if you're reading an oath, immigration would want you to actually understand wtf you're saying right? Oh no, immigration just wanted me to hurry up, read it and gtfo.
So when I look at the piece of paper, I see all these Chinese words and I think I was expected to read in Cantonese (it's not like I can't read Chinese at all, I just read in Mandarin, I know, weird), I panic. I DON'T DO WELL READING CHINESE. So when she prompts me to HURRY UP, SHE HAS WORK TO DO (funny that), I blurt out in panic: "I CAN'T READ THIS!!!" And in response, she gives me the MOST DRAMATIC EYE ROLL I've ever seen. It was more dramatic than the one the customer gave me when I told her that regrettably, tea is self service. So, offended by her dramatic eye roll, I said "well, good morning to you too, bitch".
Ok, I didn't actually say that out loud as I probably would have been arrested, but with the expression on my face? I might as well have. She handed me the English version and I read it - although not very convincingly because they used all these big words that NO ONE EVER USES in real daily English conversation and I would pause for a fraction of a second and contemplate if the word was used in the correct context before carrying on. Then I got to this: "Tsui" - a romanization of a Chinese character. Which was fine but then I got to this: "HSE" and I paused for quite a while because I didn't know whether it was a romanization of a Chinese character or what... turns out that it was a shortened word form of "House" and apparently, I was supposed to know that. I took a stab and pronounced it as it was "hse" and the lady rolled her eyes and looked at me in disbelief, "House! It's HOUSE!". Seriously? Seriously! You have oh-so-big and scary legal terms and you can't be bothered TYPING OUT THE WHOLE WORD FOR HOUSE?!!!
Oh also, just before I said the oath, I was supposed to say my name and my address - I DON'T KNOW MY ADDRESS! I've never been good with addresses! I go somewhere once and I know how to go the next time. I don't need addresses! So don't look at me like I'm stupid!
After my traumatic humiliation, I returned home and lounged around till the afternoon. I was supposed to meet my uncle from my dad's side for dinner. First, I stopped by APM Mall and bought the awesome sushi magnets (childish, I know) for Mr Head Chef before heading off to N - which was like two hours early but I wanted to hang with the boss. I know, I have issues but I was sick of staring at a blank wall and ran out of social media to stalk so I was feeling like I rather see my boss. However, just as I reached there, I got a call from my uncle saying he couldn't make it at 6 - to which K-san rejoiced at the news and excitedly told me "Great!!! You can work starting now!" So I did, for a couple of hours but during this time, I wouldn't have truly called it "work" as such. K-san called Mr. Head Chef, who sounded so happy - high on life or something beautiful and amazing. He demanded I call him as soon as I arrived in Japan. I was so happy to hear his voice, I miss all my co-workers. Mr. Head Chef then told me to work hard and work every day, to which I feebly replied "ok". It's sad because I don't have anything better to do... or anything else I rather do.
After work, my uncle turned up and we had dinner. Not much - I was so tiredddd. I was always tired, auntie mentioned it multiple times - "why are you always so tired? You're on holiday!" I don't know, probably because I was tired of life - two jobs and full time university does that to you. And my eyes were burning. I can usually wear contacts all day in New Zealand - no problem at all. Unfortunately the pollution in Hong Kong made it near impossible to wear them for more than a few hours. My uncle chided me for not bringing my glasses - hey, I had a good reason! I get major headaches and dizziness if I wear them. He took me to an optometrist from where I bought eye drops. Thank god for eye drops. I still have them now but I don't really need them in NZ.
Following this, I expected uncle to say good bye since it was nearly 10 and I WAS TIRED and wanted to take my contacts out. I learnt after that night to always bring spare solution and contact lens case around with me everywhere - basically, become better at being a member of the female species. But no, apparently dessert is supposed to happen (as is ordering a drink instead of having pure water or tea during a meal). At first, my uncle probably thought I was being polite when I decline and opt for water - no, my dear uncle. I am not trying to save you money, I actually like water. That is, of course, until I tasted Hong Kong water... I started buying French mineral water. Oh, what was for dessert? Haagen Das from a nearby mall. I have no idea what the hype for it is, basically my view on ice cream: Japan, NZ Kapiti, Movenpick, NZ Natural, Haagen Das. SORRY TO SAY, Haagen Das comes pretty low on my list.
WEDNESDAY - MONG KOK TO OPEN MY BANK ACCOUNT!
I woke up this day feeling like I had just woken up after working a very busy Friday night. I had plans with my aunt from the mainland to meet but apparently she had plans to meet at the bank. So off I went, ALL THE WAY TO MONG KOK BY MYSELF to open a bank account with HSBC. It was very hard, by far the hardest thing I've done in HK. In fact, probably the hardest thing I've done outside of NZ. They needed proof of address. It's not a common thing in NZ as everything has an electronic option. I LITERALLY GET NO MAIL. Aunt A who lives in Australia gets way more mail sent to her in NZ than I do, and I'm the one who lives in NZ!
The lady at the bank asks me, "what? You don't pay the bills? Electricity? Gas?" and I said for the fourth time, "No! I told you, I don't live in HK! There's nothing in my name in HK! Which is why I provided you with proof of my uncle's address with whom I live with!" She stares at me in disbelief and points out I have an iPhone, "You have an iPhone, surely you pay for that..." OH MY GOD. "NO! I'm only here for five weeks, my uncle lent me a spare sim card - it's under his name, he pays for it!"
So she asks me, "Do you have a driver's license?" and I reply, "yes, but not a Hong Kong one." She lights up and tells me, "OH! But you have a NEW ZEALAND one right?" To which I admit and she tells me I can provide that as proof (to which I assume, proof of identity). I hand it over and she mulls over it before dragging her male colleague over and she continues to look at it with the most confuzzled expression on her face. "No... NO WAY, this is impossible! This can't be real."
Confused, I ask, "excuse me? What did you say? You calling that fake?"
She looks up at me blankly and says, "This doesn't have your address on it. How can it not?"
Well, excuse you! No one in NZ gives a crap where you live. Everything can be checked against a database, if a police officer stops us, they can easily check it up. Why must it be displayed on our driver's license? It isn't compulsory.
I finally managed to convince her thoroughly (ok, actually I convinced the male colleague who was MUCH more helpful as he went to get his manager, the stupid lady kept refusing to budge, as if there's no one higher up than her!). They asked me if I have any letters from the government - I'm a student right? Surely I have student loans and surely they send me mail... Sorry lady, it's all done through email - which I showed them so in the end, they had to accept that. I really liked the male worker. The female one was so set in stone - everything was impossible and refused to get her manager when she couldn't sort something out. Get off your high horse! There's a reason you aren't in a management role, and if you aren't in that position, you can't possibly claim to know all the rules and policies in the book.
We cleared it, and set up my account. I got my eftpos card and set up my pin number. HK Pins are 6 digits long! Or wait, was it five? I've forgotten already and need to reset anyway. NZ ones are only 4! Regardless, after the bank was sorted, Aunt L (who by the way only got to the bank an hour after I did) took me all over Hong Kong, before settling for crab covered with cheese and high tea. By this time, I was dying for bottled mineral water - I can't drink that distilled crap.
The remnants of it...
I also saw a bunch of high end shops that I would never be able to afford... even walking into the shop..., the main branch of HSBC - very nice! - and I got my hair trimmed. I felt really sorry for the guy because it was nearly the end of his shift when I turned up. But thank you! From the hairdresser (which was in Jordan), we walked over to Festival Walk (wait, did we? Or did we take a cab? I don't remember). At one point, I bought Volvic! THANK GOD, I THOUGHT I WAS GOING TO CRY, IT WAS DELICIOUS.
Haven't had it since 2006.
Delicious, delicious, beautiful water.
At a cafe in Festival Walk, I found Fiji Water - it was expensive! I didn't buy it that day. I also saw a cardboard cutout of Andy Lau, but I didn't dare take a picture with it because I didn't want to look like a crazed fan. That and my phone ran out of battery and I really couldn't be bothered taking out my camera. Sorry, I shall attempt harder at this next time. The two of us walked and walked, we talked and talked, and when the mall closed, we hung outside the mall. She smoked and I coughed. WTF, I have weak lungs. I ended staying out late and didn't get home till nearly 1am and all I could think was: "Why do I do this to myself in NZ?! Shu, why do we make ourselves suffer in a country where there's nothing after 6pm?"
I was beyond exhausted, my eyes were burning and so were my lungs. I was regretting not buying that bottle of Fiji water - I had long run out and needing some serious water. When I got home, I went to charge my phone and once it turned on again, I saw that Uncle G had called me all night, sent text messages and left voice messages. Oops. So I sent a text back, apologising and explaining my phone died a long time ago and I just got home. The next morning? I woke up to a text from him asking me wtf was I doing out so late?! CLUBBING? LOL. Oh dear, if only he knew me... he wouldn't even suggest clubbing.
THURSDAY - not much done today.
I had plans to meet Auntie L - at this point in time, I was still unsure of the places and so it was just "a mall somewhere in Hong Kong". I didn't know what it was called, which suburb it was in and I wouldn't have been able to tell you how to get there. I did however, know how to get there since I've been there before. So I left my house by myself and went to the mall which I later came to know it as Festival Walk in Kowloon Tong.
By the time I changed trains I was already ten minutes late. I had actually planned to get there even earlier to do some window shopping - I like wandering around looking at stuff by myself. I'm such a loner. *cries* The main reason was that I couldn't be bothered leaving earlier. That and my mother called. Due to believing I was late, I ran to the station - to my amusement, I ran faster and longer in HK but then again, adrenaline? Or maybe I was bored. Only it all caught up with me when I stopped running and god, HK is not really a good place to run. There was an old man with a hunchback and limp that walked faster than me. I couldn't keep up. I don't think I could live in HK permanently.
The reason for going there was it was a special day so I was supposed to buy food for the granny. I don't actually remember what... it must have been a special day because when I told Uncle G that I can't come over for dinner, he insisted that I come after dinner with granny.
So after dinner, I left granny's house and made that trip to Tsing Yi again. Seriously, the effort it takes to push my way through hordes of people...
FRIDAY - LAST DAY IN HK BEFORE JAPAN!
My Auntie came out again to find me, she dragged me all around HK. By the end of the day, I decided that I couldn't possibly live in HK permanently. I'd die from the pollution or the BS salespeople. Near the end of the day, my cousin called me and asked me when I was coming over. I told him 4pm but my aunt just kept dragging me around, drowning me in smoke. When we finally reached the suburb my cousin lives in, the unimaginable happened (it's already past 5pm). We got sidetracked by someone trying to sell an apartment. I'm telling you, she's got SKILLS! I don't know what happened, but bro, nek minit, we were inside the apartment, looking at it. It was TINY! But the saleslady just stands there and tries to convince me that no, it's not actually tiny, it's a very good size! WTF?! My poor cousin calls me again and I'm grateful for the escape. I needed to move my ass.
Although, once we left the building, the crazy saleslady nearly convinced us to go have a look at another building about 15mins walk away (or so she says). I'm way too easily distracted, but thank god I managed to say no and leave. It was already really late and my uncle called me, "where areeeeeeee youuuuuuuuuuu?!!!!!!" Of course, I didn't know where I was EXACTLY so uncle told me to take a picture.
I was like wtf? ok...
He replies with: "You're close!!! See that fire station?!" At this point, I'm going, wtfucketyfuck what fire station?!
He exclaims in disbelief "you can't see it?! It's to your right hand side!!!" Now I have this issue with left and right and I'm pretty sure more than enough people have concluded that I'm retarded because I can't distinguish between left and right. I went quiet fro ten seconds before asking my uncle "what... does a fire station look like?" to which he responded with a while of silence before saying "a red building?" This exchange of words luckily gave me more time to think about left and right but as soon as he said red, I cursed him. There were NO red buildings in the area! Eventually we get on the same page and no, it was the yellow building that is the fire station. The yellow building with the red gates.
He hangs up after confusing me a bit with his directions (seriously, too many left and right directions). I need landmarks! Once I get to his place, I realised I couldn't actually get into the building because I didn't have a code. Once I managed to get in, I realised I never paid attention to what floor they lived on. So I left the building. Silly me! Because once I left, I couldn't get back in again. So I called his home, there was no answer, all four times I called! After a while, my cousin calls me and asks me if I'm lost and I was like: "NO!" he he was all huffy and cute and said "ok sis, I'm coming down to get you." and so he did.
I said good bye to my aunt and I went up the building with my cousin. I played with the adorable baby again and I thought to myself, "she's probably going to grow up into a manipulative girl! Because she really wants attention and when she wants it, she'll demand for it until she gets it." I spent a long time holding and cuddling and playing with her (my cousin went with the maid to buy groceries and my uncle and his wife haven't returned yet).
Once they've returned, my cousin put on the move 3 idiots. It was a very good movie! We watched while we ate dinner (Chinese style sukiyaki). Since I'm so easily distracted (and engrosed in the movie) and eating hot pots takes so much attention and concentration, I didn't handle it well. I wanted to do either one or the other, not both together. That night, my uncle wrapped up my iPhone with protective film before he sent me home.
When I arrived at my station, I noticed this vending machine of umbrellas. I was in awe. New Zealand should have this, whatever company that owns the vending machine that sells umbrellas could quite possibly make a small fortune.
Excited because the next day was going to be my flight to Japan!!!
shuyiin though, I finished my essay at 3am. Actually, she didn't do anything except for ask to hang today before my classes at 3pm. I left the house to catch the 11:58 train - and thank god for that! Trains were delayed due to wires having fallen on the tracks at Greenlane. Southern Trains bound to and from Britomart had to move over to use the tracks used by the Onehunga Line so the Onehunga train had to wait for trains to pass - otherwise, obvious catastrophe, no?
